Cultural differences - Living the first weeks of your baby with your in-laws.

The arrival of a new baby is a time filled with joy and change, but it can also come with its fair share of challenges, especially when cultural differences come into play.

Read below the story of a new mum living in Abu Dhabi. She is sharing with all of us what it's like to spend the first few weeks with her baby while living alongside her in-laws from a different culture.

Thank you for sharing your story, for your courage! 

J+J

Photo by Dunja - Quince Photography

“My fourth trimester was a very different experience to my first baby which I had back in England surrounded by my own family.

This time I gave birth in Abu Dhabi. As much as the birth itself was a great and positive experience, not having my home comforts and my own mother and sister around me made me feel extremely lonely.

In addition, this time we had my in-laws and husband's family visiting for a month. Being from 2 different continents, there is a big difference in culture. My house was constantly full and busy, therefore I was confused as to how I could possibly feel so lonely when there were so many people around me.

I was very much used to my own family's way of life and habits therefore I found it challenging having to adapt to so much change in my home whilst recovering from a C-section.

Meal times became later, the house was louder, the main conversations throughout the day and night were in a language I didn’t understand. I was so lucky to have the company and meals prepared for me but the lack of familiar things really affected me. I felt guilty to be feeling this way so held it in.

I wanted to respect the culture and make sure my husband's family felt comfortable. I was having to leave the room whilst feeding my daughter, it made me feel isolated sitting alone just because I was feeding, but I couldn’t be so free in front of my father/brother in law.

I was given help with diaper changes, meals prepared so I felt I couldn’t speak out without coming across as ungrateful but my emotions were getting overwhelming. I felt so out of control in my own home.

3 weeks after my daughter was born I eventually spoke to my husband about how I was feeling. He was so mortified I had let it get to this point where I felt on the verge of depression, I was constantly holding back. He changed from that moment and things became so much better.

My advice would be to any woman who has a clash or change of culture and doesn't know how to navigate through the change, definitely speak up.

It can be scary as you worry about the possibility of offending someone and want to remain respectful. However, it’s just adapting to change and making compromises. I reached out to my friends who come from a similar background to my husband's family and they were so understanding and really helped me navigate through the change. “

Hey Mama, if you also want to share your story, send us a message! Remember, we are not alone in this journey and this is so important to support one another.

Click here if you would you like to share your fourth trimester with us! ✨

Or send us an email with your story.